The muses, like me are real women, curvacious and soft to the touch... but both they and I rail against "portly"!

Unless of course you mean full of port, which after my recent invite to a certain Hughesian college of Cambridge, (where I sat at High Table and stroked the santa claus beard of a certain director of studies) then you may be right.

I apologise for any silences in response... unfortunatly my recent work has required a semblance of Torrance up at the big hotel, and this crazy writer , alone in her ivory tower, has had little time to converse with anyone but her house boy. And so, soon off to Morocco to recover from these strenous activities through beaded slippers and hashish.

But by all means entertain Miss Smith in her parlour. I am not the green eyed type, more nougat brown by all poetic accounts from paramours. But my plus ones will be spread elsewhere ever after...

Dotty S Parker
x

Ah, so you have not entirely disappeared from these parts... My environs have been rather less attractive lately and I was beginning to wonder if it was something I said. I knew it couldn't be anything I did, because I am also tactile, as you know from the Governor's Ball.



It was a little disturbing that you disappeared with so little warning and even worse to discover that I was becoming concerned.

That has not happened since I was a producer's intern. It is slightly worrying that you have had that effect on me, but be warned, I play hard, so it would be a risk play on your part to try and take advantage of my momentary weakness. I think you have a little making up to do lassie. And by the way, loser isn't a word in my vocabulary, so you need to put on a little speed.

Now come on Honey Button, you know what you are doing, but you should never lose sight of that big prize - that's why you are in this game, but you are going to have to learn the rules before you can break them....

Maybe you need a little time to reflect.
I'll see you in Cannes. I'm at the Belle Plage.

Tiger got your tongue?

First you attack the good Ms Parker for silence and then suggest she has a portly figure and don't stand up to apologise when all is said and done.

Bloody poets.

You misrepresent me. I was disturbed at the lady's sudden, inexplicable and unaccustomed silence and merely suggested she should not trifle with my concerns for her wellbeing.
It was you who made reference to the development of the female corpus and you quite rightly received a verbal slap for it.

Good Mr McGreggor, Mr Pix's reprimands, I think, are for me.

I have been gazing forlorn into my pint this past few months muttering as I curse what I would like to describe as poor typing but indeed may have been sudden subconsciousness vindictiveness.

All I wish the record to note, however, is that I meant to say pert.

And I stand ready to take whatever punishment the harpees of Harrods may dish out with their cunningly sharpened coffee spoons and torturous toast and tea.